I am currently in some mountain range...though I dont know the name.   Its odd...there are banana trees and pine trees.  I am in the cloud forest and it is gorgeous..it sort of looks like Sound of Music meets Latin America.

Well, last night after I wrote I ate dinner and went to the grocery store because in my room i had nothing to read and nothing to watch TV...so i did the next best thing listened to my MP3 player to some local latin music and ate a half of box of oreos since they were only a dollar.   It did provide me with some time to think and meditate which was nice.

When i woke up I felt really tired and run down but got all packed up  and found my way to the collectivo..a big van that squishes as many people in it as possible...and rode it to valle de angeles which is gorgeous and mellow.  The drive was scenic with green tropical hills...a slight mist was falling and I could have enjoyed it more except that the van driver was a maniac.  I was sure the van was going to flip over the cliff.  But everyone else seem to take it in stride. 

Parque Central in Valle De Angeles

Its a very chill town high in the mountains.  It was an old spanish minining town.   I do feel a bit tired...it gets very tiring cacthing busses, taxis, speaking a foreign language,making sure I am on the right bus, am I getting off at the right stop.  It is like perpetually being on guard which does tire one out and taxes me.  Plus I need to always be on guard for picpockets, etc.  It is always odd to travel to places where I am the only white person...I get so many stares and points and it is the one time I am very self conscious about the color of my skin.  But overall I am holding up very well.   Valle de Angeles also has ton of stall food which I know isn´t the safest but it is always the cheapest and the yummiest...I figure if I haven´t gotten sick by this point...I only have three days left.   Well, I am only here for one night and then off to Comoyaguqa....my last stop before heading back to Tegucigalpa. Unfortunately, I dont have time to fit in Copan because it is on the other end of the country.   It will have to wait for another trip.  But there are some acient ruins near comyaqua... which was the first capital of honduras until 1880.

So now I a just relaxing and unwinding and will go to dinner tonight.   I found a place that serves chorizo de la parilla so I will probably get that.  It is hard to believe that the trip is winding down and in four days I´ll be back home. I am sure that by the middle of next week...when I am at work...I will think to myself`"what trip?"

I´ve gotten a few emails where some of you have asked me why do I do such hard trips? Such exotic difficult trips?  Go to places that most people dont want to go.  I had some time last night to meditate on that and there are several reasons why.

Primarily...travelling is when i feel most centered and most spiritual.  I am focused on the here and now and my main priority is baisc needs..sleep, food, safety.  I enjoy meeting and learning all the new cultures and people and food.  I also realize due to my history....that I am mortal...and someday will die.  My time on earth is limited and I don´t want to come to die and find that I had yet not lived.  I want to experience and see as much as I possibly can in this life.  When my time to die comes I want to look back on my life and say^It was a good life...I lived it to the fullest and I experienced as much as I can.

On the other side of the coin...I think my love for travel is part of my addictive personality...I get a rush and the adrenaline pumps when it is unknown and scary.  It gives me a high.  Also,i think my love for this lifestyle is partly reactionary....growing up I was poor, didnt experience much, very overweight, and always felt less than....I felt others could run faster, do more push ups, were smarter, were better socially, and that i never really excelled at anything.  With backpacking I found the one the thing that I can excell at.  Also, when I was younger I was scared of everything...scared of swimming, scared of people, scared of doing a lot of things...and so now I feel like there is nothing to scary to overcome.  And lastly....after my trials as a child and my own battles with depression, alcholoism, anxiety, and on going medical issues coupled with my journey of coming out..I have survived them all and they have all been part of the journey that has brought me to sitting in an internet cafe in Valle De Angeles, Honduras writing to my friends and family...some of which I have known since childhood, some that have helped me on this journey, some that I have travelled with, some that I have let down, some that I have earned their trust.  Everone on this email list has touched my life in a special way and has helped make me the person I am today.  So when I look back upon all this....what is there to be scared of a dangerous city, or a flooded town, or stall food, or homeless children in a park....I have faced fears and struggles far greater than those.

Well, I didn´t mean to get so philosophical but I guess that is what happens when I dont have TV, books, DVD, etc to distract me from myself.  i hope this email finds you all well and healthy and my love and gratitude for you being a part of my life, a part of my journey, and shaping me into the spirit I am becoming.

With peace and much love and gratititude